last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Randomize
