we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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