these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
