I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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