He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
