This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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