Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
