We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
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