Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
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