just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
