but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
