yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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