i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
