You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
