You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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