I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
