If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
