i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
