so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
