Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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