ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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