I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
