do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
She tied me up with her honor cords...
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
