Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
