based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
