she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
We are two peas in an std pod
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
