ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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