I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize
