yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Randomize
