Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
