thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Randomize
