Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Randomize
