Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Randomize
