try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Randomize
