break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
