I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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