He is an equal opportunity slut.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
