belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
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