SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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