ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
