i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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