just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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