I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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