It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
