so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
