Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
