You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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