I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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