I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
