She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize
