Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
We are all done wearing pants today
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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